The weight of expectations
August 30, 2013, 5:41 pm
Filed under: Random Reflections | Tags:

The weight of expectations is incredibly heavy. I’ve discovered that how I feel has absolutely nothing to do with anything other than a belief in what I think of as ‘my’ perceptions of things, interpretations of events, expectations. It is challenging to see through, or beyond these beliefs, past the veil of conditioning that I’ve come to think of as ‘how things should be’. I wasn’t born with them! I inherited them and added to them over the years. But, in truth, the only ‘thing’ that matters is how things ARE. Now. Not how I think they should be or want them to be based on expectations (and assumptions) that have built up over years.

FreedomI can still have expectations, of course, but if I think those wants and needs are based on anything other than my ‘own’ beliefs (the beliefs I ‘own’ because I believe them), then I am deceiving myself. If I can see and know that I have those expectations while realizing they are just ideas, then I am seeing the truth of those wants or needs as ideas—nothing more.

In this way I stop deceiving myself and trying to manipulate others to live up to my expectations, or to ‘please’ me, and the weight of all those expectations just falls away.

(This is not meant to imply that chemical imbalances do not impact one’s “state of mind” and, therefore, their expectations and assumptions about the world. But even beyond those imbalances, whether seen or not, there is something ineffable, a weightlessness that is very real; more real than any belief or idea.)

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